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Sunday, April 30, 2006

England Manager

I knew I'd forget something when I was rounding up the week yesterday - the subject of the future England football manager.

The FA offered the job to Scolari, the Brazillian coach of the Portuguese national team. There was a bit of a fuss kicked up about having a foreign manager and he declined the offer. Whether this was as a result of the fuss or not I don't know, he's quite a private man by all accounts.

Personally I don't see the problem with having a foreign manager as long as he's not "British". Sven has done a pretty good job thus far and to be honest, if we win the world cup with a foreign manager, I don't much care. Sure, I'd like an English manager for our national team but I'd also like us to win the world cup and if that means getting in a foreign manager then so be it.

Two Jags, Three Shags

It turns out that the piss artist formerly known as Two Shags, formerly known as Two Jags, is actually Three Shags. Apparently the Fat Turd is a bit of a ladies man and has had at least two affairs.

Two affairs! By all rights, Prescott should be one of life's virgins but by some bizarre twist of fate he ends up as one of the most powerful men in the country and shags his secretaries.

Saturday, April 29, 2006

What a Week!

On Tuesday afternoon I set off for London with a colleague for a 3 day training course. I took my new laptop in the hope that I would be able to pick up a wireless connection from the hotel and get some browsing done but it wasn't to be.

So, I spent the best part of the week with no internet connection and what a week it's turned out to be!

Firstly, Patricia Hewitt addressing the Royal College of Nursing and getting applause from a single person in the audience and then getting heckled.

Then the news emerges that almost a thousand prisoners that should have been deported were accidently released instead. The Sweaty Baboon took full responsibility, offered his resignation and Traitor Blair refused to accept it.

Next, John Prescott changes from Two Jags to Two Shags and we find out that he had an affair with his secretary. One newspaper I saw had the headline "Prescott Affair in Pictures!". I couldn't figure out if this was intended to sell papers or put people off.

Postal Voting was the next thing in the news - 7 London boroughs are being investiagted for electoral fraud involving postal voting ahead of the upcoming local elections in London. In one tower block in Tower Hamlets, over 50% of the residents have received postal votes that they hadn't asked for. The polling station is literally next door to the tower block.

Finally, 5 of the prisoners that were released by mistake have already reoffended. Charles Clarke says sorry and the Tories call for his resignation again.

What does this tell you about the Labour Party? They are devoid of morals and utterly incompetent. They couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery, let alone run the country. Just what does a minister have to do to get the sack nowadays?

If anyone is interested, the course was a complete shambles from start to finish. Ultimately worthwhile attending but a complete shambles nonetheless.

Last Week's Twat of the Week

I found myself in the unfortunate position of being internet-less this week whilst away on a course in London. However, thanks to a colleague's trusty mobile phone, I can confirm that Patricia Hewitt was last week's Twat of the Week with 9 votes (around 40%).

Please send me your nominations for this week's Twat of the Week. Either post in the comments or contact me.

I'm back!

Got back from a course last night. Been internet-less in London since Tuesday. Normal service will resume shortly.

Monday, April 24, 2006

Twat of the Week voting

Running slightly late but time to vote for your Twat of the Week. The nominations are as follows:

Patricia Hewitt - the NHS is having its best year yet and everything is all fine, trust me - would anyone who sounds like Margaret Thatcher tell lies? A sentiment not shared by the Royal College of Nursing though who think that it's all shit and getting worse.

Cherie Blair - how many starving children can you feed for £7,700? No, it's not the beginning of one of those jokes about Ethiopian - Cherie Blair spent £7,700 on hair styling during the last election campaign, paid for by the Labour Party, presumably from their peerage bung slush fund.

Sean Connery - "just because he is a twat of the twats and have never been nominated!"

Charles Clarke - the Sweaty Baboon has been wobbling around making all sorts of pronouncements on how he's going to further limit our democracy and freedoms.

David Cameron - what's the most effective way to oppose the government? That's right, ponce about on a glacier talking about dual-fuel cars. Sorry Dave, there are slightly more pressing matters at home you could be dealing with like ID cards, devolution, racism in the health service over Herceptin for a start.

Andy Burnham - "the home oriface minister who wants to spend so much money on ID cards that the Tories won't be able to scrap them". See this for more details.

Paul Rivers - writing in a local newspaper, Mr Rivers tells readers that he is opposed to celebrating St Georges Day and an English identity but fails to explain that he is the same europhile Paul Rivers who campaigns for regional assemblies, the ultimate aim of which are to divide England into euroregions.

Twat of the Week
Patricia Hewitt
Cherie Blair
Sean Connery
Charles Clarke
David Cameron
Andy Burnham
Paul Rivers
Free polls from

England our England

An excellent book, well worth a read. Some frightening statistics and predictions.

England Our England by Vernon Cole.

Sunday, April 23, 2006

Happy St Georges Day

Saturday, April 22, 2006

St George's Day Asda be a Public Holiday

Asda stores have been asking people to sign the Charles Wells Brewery petition for a St George's Day public holiday. The petition is also supported by the Times newspaper.

Brixton Prison

Two toilet blocks in Brixton Prison are being renovated and having the toilets moved so that muslim inmates don't have to face Mecca when they're taking a dump. Muslim "Leaders" told the prison authorities that it was unacceptable.

If they don't want to face Mecca when they take a shit then they can just not break the law. How's that sound?

BBC Timelines Still Innacurate

Since my last complaint, the BBC have amended their country profile articles to replace the word British with English when talking about things the English did prior to the 1707 Act of Union. Their timelines haven't been amended though so I've sent them a comment about the accuracy of the following country timelines:

St Kitts & Nevis

The BBC is used extensively in education around the world, the least they can do is make it accurate.

George says Sorry

George Bush has apologised to the Chinese President for allowing a demonstrator to exercise her democratic right, protected by the US constitution, to peaceful protest. The Chinese President "graciously accepted" the apology. That's alright then.

Letter: Northern Echo


PAUL RIVERS is opposed to celebrations to mark St George's Day (HAS, Apr 20), which takes place tomorrow. I wonder why?

Could it be anything to do with St George's Day being an expression of our English nationality, what with him being a campaigner for a regional assembly and all? Oh yes, he forgot to mention that in his letter, didn't he?

Perhaps Mr Rivers would prefer a National European Region Day or a Regional Patron Saint instead?

It wasn't so long ago that people who conspired against England were branded traitors. Now, they are usually called pro-Europeans or politicians.

Stuart Parr, Telford, Shropshire.

Friday, April 21, 2006

Twat of the Week nominations

Please send your Twat of the Week nominations using the contact form or post in the comments.

"Independent" information on the EU

The British government has launched a website to give us "independent" information on the EU free from criticism propoganda and mistruths from well educated eurosceptics dangerous anti-European racist xenophobic nazi nationalist facists. - provided by the Foreign & Commonwealth Office.

Mobile Phone Scam Artists

Sitting at work, minding my own business and my mobile rings. Same number that drop called me last night, wonder who's going to try and part me from my money this time.

The usual foreign accent of indeterminate origin and broken English greeted me ...

"Hello I am calling from Advanced Mobiles can I confirm you are a customer of T-Mobile?"
"No. Who are you and where did you get my telephone number?"
"I am calling from Advanced Mobiles we are an authorised dealer for T-Mobile and I would like to offer you ..."
"What's your company's telephone number please?"
"It is 87144 ..."
"No, your number in the UK"
"That is UK number"
"No it isn't"
"Yes is UK number"
"No it isn't, all UK numbers start with a zero, that's a foreign number"
"Yes we are in Dubai"
"So, what is the number of your company in the UK who are going to send me a phone?"
"874 ..."
--- snip ---
"So are you interested in new phones sir?"
"No, I just want to know where you got my number from"
"It is publically available information"
"No it isn't"
"Yes is publically available information under Data Protection Act"
"No it isn't, I used to teach Data Protection Act at a bank so don't lie to me"
"We are authorised dealer for T-Mobile how many handsets do you have?"
"You mean T-Mobile haven't told you?"
"I'm in contract to T-Mobile still and they have told you to phone me and they haven't told you how many phones I have?"
"No I do not even know your name but T-Mobile will give you phones even if you are in contract"
"No they won't, I used to be a mobile phone dealer so do not lie to me. What is your company name?"
"I am calling from Advanced Mobile we are authorised ..."
"So you are registered with T-Mobile as Advanced Mobiles?"
"We are authorised deal of ..."
"So I can phone T-Mobile and you will be registered with them as Advanced Mobiles?"
"We are autho ..."
"You don't know do you?"
"We are ..."
"You don't know"
"Are you interested in mobile phone contacts?"

Hung up at that point as I'd been on the phone for 5 minutes running this muppet ragged. Turned round and everyone was looking at me. Apparently they enjoy listening to me take calls from cold callers.

Obviously I wanted to get my name off their mailing list so onto Google. came up as the top match - 75 comments on this company with a 5 thumbs down rating for every one. Impressive. Tried to call them and got hold music forever so gave that up and called T-Mobile. Apparently they are also known by another couple of names, one of which is associated with Carphone Warehouse, the cowboys who have been giving my telephone number to various companies. T-Mobile said there wasn't a lot they could do about it but suggested I speak to Carphone Warehouse again.

I called Advanced Communications, the company behind the call. Told them to take my details off the list and was told T-Mobile had given them my details. Told them they hadn't as I had already checked and that it was Carphone Warehouse that had done it. The woman said it must have Carphone Warehouse then and I should call them. I told her I had already done that a couple of months back and they said they had told everyone to stop calling me so she could me off her database now. She said she would although I doubt it very much.

Some more Googling came up with some interesting information as did a check of Companies House. According to Companies House, Advanced Communications Limited was incorporated in 2002 and has submitted no accounts since it became a limited company. Companies House has now proposed to strike them off the register which means they will no longer be a limited company. I wonder if their staff know ...

Anyway, I phoned T-Mobile again and it turns out they have a procedure for dealing with these types of things so someone took all the details, thanked me for doing the research into the company for them and said that he hoped they sorted that company out as these dodgy dealers are a real pain in the neck. My sentiments exactly.

So, if anyone gets a call from advanced Mobiles or Advanced Communications, avoid them like the plague. The company is on the verge of being struck off and they have been investigated by both Trading Standards and Watchdog.

Queen's Birthday

Today is the 80th birthday of Queen Elizabeth II. This is her real birthday, not her official birthday which is in June and isn't the day she was born on.

Looking at pictures of events in Windsor where she is staying I noticed an abundance of Cross of St Georges. There were a lot of Union Flags as well which is to be expected as she is the Queen of the whole of the UK but I was really pleased to see English bunting hanging in front of the British flag and other English flags. Hopefully it will remind her that her most loyal subjects are the English as opposed to our neighbours who seem intent on abandoning her as the "English Queen".

To commemorate her birthday, Lord Snowdon has taken this picture:

I like it. She doesn't look like a Queen, just like someone's nan.

Bad Hair Day

Cherie Blair had £7,700 worth of haircuts in the last election campaign. The hairdresser charged £220 per day to do her hair while she followed the traitor round on his campaign trail and the Labour Party footed the bill.

Now let's be honest, if you were spending £7,700 on improving Cherie Blair's looks would you spend it on her hair? Personally, I'd go for a big sack or plastic surgery.

Thursday, April 20, 2006


Still don't know what to say about this. Shropshire PCT has refused to provide Herceptin to Shropshire women despite a court ruling recently that refusing the drug for some women and not others was unlawful.

I just can't get my head around how, when North British and West British women (the latter in a Shropshire Hospital), can have Herceptin free of charge and English woman can't. This is racism but nobody seems to want to do anything about it. I emailed the CRE a while ago to complain about it and heard nothing - not even an acknowledgement.

One of the MP's in Shropshire has written to the Health Secretary asking who exactly runs the health service in this country because the Health Secretary has told PCT's not to deny the drug on the grounds of cost and they continue to do so.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

No Herceptin for Shropshire

Shropshire PCT has decided against giving Shropshire women Herceptin but Welsh women will still be allowed to receive it for free at Shropshire's Royal Shrewsbury Hospital.

It's too late in the day for a long commentary so check back tomorrow for something more meaningful.

Don't Elect the House of Lords

To see both side of this argument and both sets of comments on one page, click here

Gavin Ayling believes that we should elect the House of Lords. I don't and I'll explain why ...

The House of Commons is elected. To be elected to the House of Commons, you have to stand for election, publish a manifesto and win more votes than your opponents. This, for me, is where my opposition to an elected upper house lies and can be summed up in two words - Career Politicians.

Career politicians are in the job because they want to be, they have ambition. They have chosen a career path that involves them securing and using political power. They will do whatever it takes (usually within reason) to ensure that they get elected and stay elected. If that means abandoning one or more of their principles then more often than not they will make that sacrifice.

With the exception of a few independents, career politicians rely on their party to get them a seat and fund their campaign. In order to be chosen to represent their party in an election they must comply with party policy. In order to keep their seat they must continue to comply with party policy. When Traitor Blair first stood for election he stood on an anti-European manifesto and lost. Next time round he won and has since professed to be a committed European "always have been, always will be". Being pro-European is part of being Labour and even the Prime Minister, the leader of this country, has sold out on his principles to curry favour with the party.

Anyway, this is in danger of getting slightly off topic.

The House of Lords, prior to the election of the Liberal government at the turn of the last century, was entirely hereditary with the exception of Lords Spiritual that represented (and still do) the Church of England. Nobody in the House of Lords was elected, they were all there by virtue of birth and they had the authority to veto legislation coming from the Commons.

The Liberal government tried to pass a budget in 1910 that included a land tax that would have been especially detrimental to landowners. The Lords opposed the budget and the Liberal government conceived the Parliament Bill which would establish the ultimate supremacy of the Commons over the Lords. The Lords opposed the Bill until King George threatened to create 250 new Liberal peers to dilute the Conservative majority in the upper house. The Lords conceded and the bill was passed into law.

The Parliament Act of 1911 and the subsequent revision of 1949 conspired to allow the Commons to disregard the opinion of the Lords if they opposed bills proposed in the House of Commons.

The Parliament Act of 1911 was infrequently used but its most significant use was to pass the Parliament Act of 1949. The Lords, mindful that the Commons were giving themselves yet more power and removing more opposition, opposed the revised version of the Parliament Act. The Labour government of the day, under Clement Atlee, followed the example set by the Liberal government in 1911 and used king for political gain.

The 1911 Parliament Act specified that the Lords would have to oppose a bill over three sessions of parliament before the Parliament Act could be used to force the bill into law. The Labour government had the king engineer a short session of parliament so that the clause would be artifically met and they could use the Parliament Act to force through the revised Parliament Act giving themselves more power.

The 1949 Parliament Act was also used infrequently until the current Labour government came to power since when it has been used more times than every other previous government combined to over-rule the will of the upper house.

The problem here is with the desire for power which career politicians naturally crave. It was a Liberal government consisting of career politicians that first nutured their overseers in 1911 and a Labour government of career politicians in 1949 that further removed the checks and balances to their power.

Lord Acton said "Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men." He said this 24 years before the 1911 Parliament Act came into being, I wonder if he had a vision of the future?

Ok, that's the history lesson over and done with.

The most important thing to remember about hereditary peers is that they sat in the upper house by virtue of birth. Their political affiliation was irrelevant. It was quite conceivable to have a Labour peer in the House of Lords that opposed policies of the Labour government despite being a member of that party. This could rarely happen in the Commons and certainly for no longer than the time of the next election when they would be replaced with a party faithful candidate.

There is, of course an issue of accountability with hereditary peers. Who keep an eye on them? Who can oppose them if they do something that isn't considered to be right? Well, without an impartial (as impartial as it can be) upper house, who will keep an eye on the Commons? The electorate? Sadly, most people would vote for the same party if they fielded a goldfish as their candidate so as bizarre as it sounds, the elctorate cannot be relied upon to protect their own interests!

A key part of the appeal of hereditary peers for me is the fact that they are more likely to do what is "right" than a career politician. A career politician will do what they think their constituents think is "right" or what their party tells them is "right". If something is "right" for the country but wrong for their party and/or political future they are unlikely to make that decision. A hereditary peer will still be in a job whether they are popular or not.

Since the current Labour government "reformed" the House of Lords and did away with most of the hereditary peers, they have appointed themselves a majority in the upper house. If the Lords were to be elected, it is simply not imaginable that the people would elect opposing parties to each house. The dominant party in the Commons would be the dominant party in the Lords so where is the opposition and oversight that is required?

Effective oversight of the Commons requires impartiality of the Lords. The only way to ensure that the make-up of the Lords is random enough to make this conceivable is to have hereditary peers.

Finally, I have a proposal that will resolve the issue of hereditary Lords over-ruling the Commons and the requirement for laws to be passed without the consent of the Lords. The answer, I feel, lies not in handicapping the upper house but in arbitration. I would like to see the Parliament Act further amended to replace the clause that allows the Commons to pass a law without consent of the Lords after it has been delayed for three sessions of parliament with a clause that provides for a binding referendum, thus allowing the people to decide on matters that both houses cannot agree on.

Apologies for the scrappy nature of this post but it was a bit rushed.

Starting the offensive over West Midlands City Region

I've blogged about this West Midlands City Region before and today I decided to take the offensive over the secrecy and lack of information available for this proposal.

First port of call was the Regional Assembly which produced the one report I've managed to extract from Telford & Wrekin Council. They quickly directed me to a North Briton by the name of Sandy Taylor at Birmingham City Council. I left a message for him to call me, he didn't so I rang back and made a nuisance of myself until they put me through to him. We spoke for 20 minutes in which I told him how I saw it and cleared up a few queries.

Before I go any further, here are my problems with the proposed City Region:

  • The Leader of each council subsumed into the City Region will be appointed to the Executive Board of the City Region
  • The Chief Executive of each council subsumed into the City Region will be appointed to the City Region Steering Group
  • The City Region Programme Board has already met twice despite the proposal not having been approved
  • Telford will be a "safety valve" if development in the metropolitan areas falls below targets - extra development in Telford will take up the slack
  • The unelected West Midlands Regional Assembly will provide scrutiny of the City Region
  • Visibility and publicity activity ensuring local people know what the City Region is about will take place after the City Region has been implemented
  • The City Region is supported by the West Midlands Regional Assembly
  • The City Region will be unelected
  • Proposals for an elected City Region mayor are opposed in favour of being wholly unelected
  • The City Region is a "challenge" from the Office of the Deputy Prime Minister
  • The City Region will be accountable to the unelected West Midlands Regional Assembly which is accountable only to John Prescott
  • City Regions work elsewhere in the world but other countries don't have assymetric devolution with Cities competing against devolved national governments
  • Extra funding promised by UK government as a condition of implementing the City Region which is tantamount to bribery*
  • The proposal has been written up and submitted but won't be available to the public until June/July this year

* Birmingham says this is not true but other sources indicate that it is

Anyway, after discussing most of the above with the man from Birmingham, I decided to call the Standards Board of England which is the ombudsman for elected representitives. You see, the Chief Executive of Telford & Wrekin Council and the Leader or the Council both stand to gain from this proposal as they will gain positions in a highly influential regional government. The Standards Board for England says that if a councillor stands to gain status above that of fellow councillors as a result of a decision then they have a prejudicial interest.

With this in mind I called Telford & Wrekin Council's Legal and Democratic Services Department and put it to them that both these men have a prejudicial and personal interest in the proposal and that the leader of the council, who has publically endorsed the proposal, has a pre-determined opinion and will not be entering the meeting this month to rubber-stamp the proposal with an open mind as he is required by law to do so. They don't agree but said that I can put my case to the council's solicitor next week when he comes back off his jollies.

Descisions, decisions ...

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

English Farmers face bankruptcy over late subsidy payments

English farmers face bankruptcy over the late payment of subsidies from the Rural Payments Agency.

The UK government decided that the method of payment for English farmers should change to a complicated mathmatical sum and ordered a new computer system. Which has failed. Unsurprising really as the UK government seem incapable of getting a computer system right.

Being a devolved matter in Scotland and Wales, farmers outside of England received their subsidies in the same way they have for years without delay or major cock-ups. The farmers who will really be suffering are the ones on the borders such as Shropshire where half the farmers at their local market will have had their subsidies 6 months ago while they are racking up huge debts trying to keep afloat until the subsidies finally get paid.

Guy Fawkes or St George?

Apparently, English people are more than 3 times more likely to celebrate Guy Fawkes Night than St Georges Day. In a survey carried out for English Heritage, only 19% of the 1.800 people asked were planning to celebrate St Georges Day although over half of those who weren't planning to celebrate said this was because they didn't know what was appropriate.

It's sad really, isn't it? The UK government are happy to encourage celebration of the man who tried to blow their precious parliament up but actively discourage any attempts to celebrate our patron saint.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Slugging it out with Ayling

Gavin Ayling, fellow Witanagemot Blogger and CEP member, is supporting the Elect the Lords campaign. I, on the other hand, am most certainly not.

So, in accordance with the finest of English traditions, it's pistols at dawn. Ok, well Wednesday evening and there won't actually be any guns involved and nobody is going to get hurt ... except for RSI perhaps.

What we are going to do is put our respective arguments - Gavin's for an elected House of Lords and mine for a return to hereditary peers - into something approaching a coherent argument and then slug it out in the blogosphere.

If anyone can think of an easy way of sharing comments then please let me know. Unfortunately, we don't both use Haloscan for comments so no easy fix there.

Suicide Bomb in Tel Aviv

A Palestinian suicide bomber has killed 9 people and injured 50 in Tel Aviv. Islamic Jihad has claimed responsibility and says that it is in retaliation for "Israeli massacres" in the Gaza Strip. A 19 year old Palestinian has also been killed by an Israeli shell in the north of the Gaza Strip.

I can't imagine what could drive a person to do a suicide bombing. Sure, their religion must be a big part of it, particularly the brainwashing they get from thoe people organising them who are too cowardly to do it themselves. But underneath it all there must be some real disaffection for the brainwashers to work with.

The BBC normally gives Palestine a relatively fair hearing when it comes to reporting events in their little corner of the world. They often get accused of bias towards Palestine. However, the report about the 19 year old Palestinian being killed warranted an "In other violence ..." one-liner in the story about the suicide bombing.

The death of one Palestinian isn't on the same scale as the suicide bombing so that's fair enough right? Put it into perspective. A Palestinian has blown himself up and killed 9 innocent Israeli's. The Israeli Army has shelled a civillian area in the Gaza Strip and killed an innocent Palestinian. Surely the Army, as an executive branch of the Israeli government, shouldn't be shelling civillian areas and killing innocent civillians?

What if this was in Northern Ireland 10 years ago? An IRA bomber sets a bomb off in a high street somewhere and kills 9 people. In retaliation for IRA bombings, the British Army deliberately shells a residential suberb of Belfast and kills an innocent member of the public.

Which one is worse? What if the roles were reversed in Israel and Palestine and it was an Israeli suicide bomber and a Palestinian shell killing an Israeli? My guess is that most "friends of Israel" would back the suicide bomber and criticise the Palestinian Army.

Twat of the Week: Michael Frater

Well, a surprise winner of this weeks Twat of the Week. The fact that the Chief Executive of the relatively unimportant and unknown Telford & Wrekin Borough council got more votes than Traitor Blair and the Fat Turd from all over the country, not just in Telford, just goes to show what a twat he must be.

Michael Frater (aka Frater the Traitor), Labour Party stooge, EU and regional evangelist has sold Telford to the West Midlands for inclusion in the proposed West Midlands City Region. There has been no public consultation, nor is there any intention to hold any. The whole proposal is wrapped in secrecy, bribery and corruption and attempts to obtain information or (heaven forbid) a copy of the proposal are greeted with brick walls and obstacles intended to mislead and stifle any and all debate.

Michael Frater 34%10
John Prescott 14%4
David Milliband 14%4
Tony Blair 7%2
Margaret Beckett 3%1
David Cameron 28%8
29 votes total

The votes say it all. Michael Frater, you are this weeks Twat of the Week.

Sunday, April 16, 2006

A productive afternoon

My parents came round for Sunday lunch today and my dad's a bit handy with a toolbox so when I spotted a spare broom handle in the garage I thought I'd enlist his help in using it to fly my Cross of St George which has been sitting in the cupboard under the stairs for about two years now.

"But how are you going to tie the flag to it?" asked Mrs Sane. "I'll get the drill" says I. After charging the drill (I do so much DIY I had to find the battery to the drill first which hasn't been used for so long it was dead) I got the old man to drill a couple of holes to tie the flag to. One makeshift flag pole. Sorted.

"But what are you going to attach it to?" asked Mrs Sane. Ah, hadn't thought about that. Send dad up the ladder to inspect the wood shuttering on the porch. The wood is strong enough to take the strain but the flag is going to drag across the roof and it's not going to last long. Back to the drawing board.

"I'm going to fix it to the kids play house" says I. Mrs Sane rolls her eyes and goes into the kitchen. Drag dad into the garden to fix it to the kids play house. Send him up the ladder again ... the wood is too thin.

Then we had one of those genius moments that only two fully qualified bodge job experts can have. You'll like this. Rotary washing line, folded up and tied tightly, fixed into one of those metal stands for parasols with the "flag pole" attached using strimmer wire and insulation tape. Genius!

Ok, it's not ideal and from this side of the fence it looks a bit of an eyesore but it looks good from the public side of our garden. In fact, it had been up less than five minutes before a gang-o-lads came walking past chanting England.

Happy Easter

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Twat of the Week voting

Ok, time to get this weeks Twat of the Week voting underway.

The candidates this week are ...

Michael Frater - aka Frater the Traitor, the Chief Executive Collaborator of Telford & Wrekin Council who has sold Telford to a West Midlands City Region which will turn Telford into an effective colony of Birmingham and may even be the regional straw that breaks the English camel's back.

John Prescott - aka the Fat Turd, an old favourite and multiple winner of Twat of the Week.

David Milliband - Minister for the Regions and the man tasked by the British government to complete its policy of balkanisation and eradication of England.

Tony Blair - aka Traitor Blair, another regular and most frequent winner of Twat of the Week, this weeks nomination is for spending huge amounts using the Royal Flight.

Margaret Beckett - for the same reason as Traitor Blair.

David Cameron - Big Dave wrote the last Tory election manifesto centred around immigration then calls UKIP members closet racists for focusing on immigration.

Twat of the Week
Michael Frater
John Prescott
David Milliband
Tony Blair
Margaret Beckett
David Cameron
Free polls from

Friday, April 14, 2006

Letter: Shropshire Star

England deserves the same

Democracy may have been invented in ancient Greece but it was the English who spread it around the world.

The legal systems of half the developed world are baaed on English common law. the Magna Carta, Bill of Rights and Habeas Corpus.

All these achievements have been sidelined by New Labour, the most dangerous thing to happen to the English since the bubonic plague.

The other day the Lord Chancellor, Lord Falconer (a Scottish Labour quisling), told a conference in London that the English don't want their own parliament and that we will never get one.

He had no such objections when he promoted the Scottish Parliament and Welsh Assembly 10 years ago and it is as a direct result of this half-baked, undemocratic devolution settlement that we find the English fighting for equal rights.

The BBC ran a poll on their website asking whether England should have its own parliament. Aa I write, over 72 per cent of people have voted yes.

ITV Teletext carried out a phone poll asking the same question - the result was 95 percent in favour.

Stuart Parr

West Midlands City Region propoganda

City link-up would bring prosperity, says report

Telford & Wrekin is on the brink of joining the new "metropolitan city" of the West Midlands - a move which could secure the economic future of the borough for generations to come.

Joining forces with Birmingham, the Black Country, Coventry and Solihull would bring a huge jobs and investment bonanza for Telford, supporters claim.

And they insist it would not mean the borough being hit by big city crime or having its green spaces swallowed up by housing estates and Factories.

The points are made in a report to Telford & Wrekin Council's cabinet on April 24 by Gerry Dawson, the borough's head of regeneration and economic development.

Councillors are being urged to press ahead with the city plan which is likely to be approved by the Government later this month.

Mr Dawson says in his report that the most successful European cities - such as booming Frankfurt, in Germany - are "decentralised and streamlined" in the way they are run.

British cities like Birmingham and Manchester, over which central government retains considerable power, currently languish near the bottom of the economic list.

But creating a new go-ahead West Midlands city, free of red tape and central control, is said to be the way forward.

Telford's strategic location, its excellent road links and potential for helping the Black Country by providing land for complementary housing and economic growth are all big factors in this.

Joining up with the West Midlands, Mr Dawson says, would avoid Telford being "squeezed out" of investment flowing to the rest of the region.


I haven't blogged about Iran announcing its ability to make nuclear power stations before today because, to be honest, it's a bit of a non-issue. If you're talking about people that have nuclear weapons that really shouldn't then I'd be more concerned about the trigger-happy lunatic running the USA and India and Pakistan, both of which seem committed to nuking each other off the face of the planet.

The way people are going on about this, especially the aforementioned lunatic and his fellow inmates, you'd think they'd just announced their first successful test of a nuclear warhead, not that they'd just successfully produced some low-grade enriched uranium for a nuclear power station.

The US is itching to send its troops over the border now that they've realised they can't control Iraq. There was even a suggestion earlier in the week that George Bush had considered a tactical nuclear strike. Nostradamus said the end of the world as we know it would be started by someone of mongol descent. Has anyone ever investigated Georgy Porgy's ancestry?

I am not a number ...

As Patrick McGoohan said in the Prisoner, I am not a number - I am a free man! Yeah, well we're all going to have one of those moments shortly when the UK government's National Spy ID Database comes online.

No2ID have sponsored an eBay auction for the right to give campaigner Michael Cole his very own number before the Scottish Raj get a chance. Someone suggested 198419841984.

Letters in the Independent

Two letters in the Independent, one about Herceptin being given free to Welsh women in the Royal Shrewsbury Hospital but English women being charged £47k and the other asking a very good question about whether chargin English students at Welsh universities more than other EU citizens is actually lawful.

Blame the Scots and Welsh MPs

Sir: Your report (10 April) on the inconsistency of Shrewsbury Royal Hospital depriving patients resident in England of the latest anti-cancer drugs which are available to those resident in Wales shows up another unintended consequence of ill-thought through government legislation.

Similar inconsistencies are developing between England and the other nations of the UK in areas such as social care for the elderly, financing of students in higher education, and state subsidy of public transport.

It makes no odds to anyone working in Shrewsbury whether they commute from Telford or from Welshpool, but if you have children approaching tertiary education, parents likely to need a place in a care home, or a partner suffering the early stages of breast cancer, you would be foolish indeed not to make your residence in Wales.

The result is that house prices and rents rise in Wales relative to neighbouring parts of England, poorer people are forced out of the areas with the better social spending arrangements, and those the measures were mainly intended to support most lose out most.

It is not as if the English can do anything about this at the ballot box: most of the decisions resulting in these anomalies are made by Scottish ministers backed up by Scottish and Welsh MPs whose constituents are not affected by these measures.


You can comment on this letter here.

Penalising the English

Sir: Q: When can you be English and not part of the EU? A: If you're an English student and applying to a Welsh university. The Welsh Assembly has reduced the fees payable to Welsh universities for all Welsh students from the standard £3,000 to £1,200. The remaining £1,800 will be paid by British taxpayers. This restricts freedom of movement of Welsh students for financial reasons, and forces others to pay more. That includes those who want veterinary studies because there is no course in Wales. And students from Scotland, Northern Ireland and the rest of the EU, but not England, will also only pay £1,200. Is this legal under the European Convention of Human Rights?


You can comment on this letter here.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Twat of the Week nominations

How organised am I? Twat of the Week nominations in the comments or by contact form please.

Tesco are going to look for the taters

Following my email to Tesco last night asking them where all the taters have gone, they have replied with a serious promise to look for the English (or "British") potatoes at an upcoming meeting.
Thank you for your email.

I fully appreciate your comments. We aim to provide the best possible service for our customers and any feedback or suggestions made are always very welcome.

The relevant department dealing with such matters has been notified and I can assure you that this will be taken on board at the next review meeting. I cannot guarantee that action will be taken, however your views and comments are invaluable to us.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

If you have any further queries please do not hesitate to contact us at quoting TES2052491X.

Kind Regards

Laura Pollock
Tesco Customer Service
I hope it's not the same meeting as the ones mentioned in the word-for-word copies of this same email I've found on the internet otherwise I could be waiting a long time. Naturally I've emailed Tesco back to ask if there is anyone in the company who can write an email without a pre-prepared script.

Letter: Shropshire Star (not one of mine)

Parliament dominated by Scottish politicians
Stuart Parr recently wrote that life-saving cancer treatments available in Scotland were denied to patients by the NHS in England.

That was only one illustration of how the Scots have the advantage over the English taxpayer. A significant few extra to be added to the list of freebies in Scotland are student tuition fees, free care for the elderly, vast improvements to the rail services and new tramway schemes. In England our transport minister (a Scot) has cancelled new and projected improvements for environmentally-friendly transport schemes in Liverpool, Leeds, Manchester and Birmingham.

We have a Government entirely dominated by Scots and a Parliament where Scottish and Welsh members can vote on entirely English matters.

Lord Baker attempted to introduce a Bill to prevent this and was talked down by Lord Chancellor Falconer (another Scot).

There is a definite attempt to wipe England off the map and impose regional Government with all its attendant bureacracy.

When will voters in England wake up and get rid of a Government that treates us unfairly? It is no wonder that many are deserting this country for France and Spain where they have Governments that fight for their interests.

John T Thornicroft
Market Drayton

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Regional Health Authority

Traitor Blair and Patricia Hewitt called 16 English hospital and PCT managers to Downing Street to tell them that "look chaps ... you need to do something about your debts (punch own hand) so that the NHS can ... you know (firm smile, no teeth) ... give a better deal to patients".

Following the meeting the Health Secretary, Patricia Hewitt, made the announcement that Shropshire Health Authority is being merged with all the other health authorities in the West Midlands to create a regional authority. Just like that. No consultation, no debate, no arguments.

The regional agenda in the West Midlands is being implemented at a fair old rate of knots. Frater the Traitor has sold Telford to Birmingham for its West Midlands City Region. West Mercia Police are being forced to merge with West Midlands Police to form a reigonal police force. The fire and ambulance services have already been regionalised. This has to stop. Nobody wants the regions but nobody is being given the opportunity to speak against it. These decisions are all being taken in secret and only announced when it is too late.

Court rules denial of Herceptin "Illogical and unlawful"

An appeal court has today ruled that denying Herceptin to some women and giving it to others is "illogical and unlawful".

Shropshire PCT won't give Herceptin to Shropshire women unless they pay £47k privately for a course of treatment but Welsh women can come to the Royal Shrewsbury Hospital and have it for free. This is apparently because there is "a lack of national clarity". Nothing to do with rampant racism and discrimination then?

Home Office on ID Cards and Police Mergers

I've had a reply to a previous enquiry to the Home Office which you can read here.

One thing immediately struck me as strange. The police forces have to be merged into regional forces (which of course have nothing to do with the EU) so they can fight serious and organised crime. So what was the point of setting up SOCA?

Where have all the taters gone?

I've just fired another email of to Tesco customer services about their anti-English marketing.
Hello, me again. My mother-in-law has taken my wife to Tesco twice in the last fortnight. Both times she has tried to buy potatoes and has come away without any. Shall I tell you why? Because the first time she could only buy British or Scottish potatoes and the second time because even the potatoes that have previously been labelled as British now have a Scottish flag on them! Unbelievable. Even my mother-in-law has now decided to boycott Tesco in disgust at your anti-English marketting.

What does the Union Jack mean to you?

The BBC would like to know what the "union jack" means to you. If I was being pedantic I would say that the union jack means a British flag flying off a ship but that would be totally out of character ... ahem.

Anyway, I have sent them my comments but as it is anti-British there is little chance of it getting past the moderators. They certainly wouldn't have published what I really wanted to say - What does the union flag mean to me? Union Jack Shit.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

West Midlands City Region

So what's all this Cty Region malarky about? I asked Telford & Wrekin Council why they were signing us up to this new tier of undemocratic regional government without any public consultation. Surprisingly, I got a couple of pages in response. Predictably, it reads like a sales pitch. Do try and stay awake.
Dear Mr Parr

West Midlands Region

Thank you for your enquiry through the Councils website about the West Midlands City region.

The Chief Executive, Michael has asked me to reply on his behalf.

Firstly I thought it would be useful to give a short explanation of what the City Region concept is about. There is considerable disparity in the performance of the 56 major cities in England. The government is developing policy to ensure city regions improve there performance applying the lessons of the most successful cities in Europe and North America. The Government believe that the contribution all of the cities in England could make to the gross domestic product (GDP) can be raised towards a level closer to the performance of the best in the rest of the World. If the national GDP can be enhanced then the quality of life for citizens living outside of the South East area could be improved. In the last few weeks the Government have published three major papers about economic activity and development and the role that major cites play. The three major papers are:-

• A framework for City Regions published February 2006
• State of English Cities March 2006
• Devolving decision making - meeting the regional economic challenge, the importance of cities to regional growth published March 2006.

All of the above documents can be found on the website at

The "Core Cities Group" comprises the eight city councils of Birmingham, Bristol, Leeds, Liverpool, Manchester, Newcastle, Nottingham and Sheffield. These Cities have been working together for ten years and their agenda is essentially about economic improvement. In early 2005 the Minister for Local Government and Communities met with the Core Cities Group following which emerged a "City Region approach" to economic growth. The idea of establishing "City Region Partnerships" has now been taken up by the Core Cities as well as the ODPM.

The seven metropolitan Councils in the West Midlands area (Birmingham, Coventry, Solihull, Walsall, Dudley, Sandwell) initially came together to form a City Region partnership to develop a business case at the request of the Local Government Communities Minister which would include policy and investment proposals for strengthening thecompetitiveness of the City Region, together with proposals to deliver strong and effective governance.

The Leader and Chief Executive of this Council felt very strongly that in addition to the sevenMetropolitan Councils, Telford and Wrekin should also be included in the City Region Partnershipso that it could benefit from improvements in economic competitiveness that may flow from this proposal.

At this stage it is quite in order for the Chief Executive to pursue what is believed to be in the bestinterests of the Council and this is the inclusion of this Council within the City Region Partnership.

It is not necessary for there to have been consultation at this stage. The decision to proceed with a bid within the City Region Partnership will be a matter for the Councils Cabinet as it has the responsibility for this issue. The Cabinet will be receiving a report about progress with the CityRegion initiative at its meeting on the 24th April 2006.

There is no intention to hold a referendum about the Councils inclusion in this initiative as it is a matter for the Cabinet. There has been no decision taken in secret and consultation is not necessary.

The Cabinet will ultimately decide (as the elected representatives of this area) how proposals within the City Region are shaped and developed and what is eventually submitted to the ODPM.

At the moment there is no clarity about how many City Region Partnerships the government will support. The West Midlands will be bidding against other regions for this initiative and at this stageit is not know what the likelihood of success will be. However, both the Leader and the Chief Executive believe that the economic and other benefits to Telford warrant the Councils inclusion with the seven Metropolitan Councils and at this stage the Council intend to pursue the City Region Partnership.

In conclusion can I stress that this is not the creation of an additional tier of government, it will, if approved be a partnership of eight urban Councils working together to address issues of common concern, working within the framework of existing regional strategies such as the Regional Economic Strategy and the Regional Spatial Strategy.

If you require any clarification on this letter please let me know.


Elayne Bates
Executive Office Manager
Do I require any clarification? Well, yes I do. I would like to know on what authority Michael Frater thinks he can hand over powers to an unelected regional government and what gives him even the vaguest impression that there is any support whatsoever in Telford, Shropshire, the West Midlands or anywhere else in the entire damn country for any form of regional government.

When will these people listen? England yes, regions no! The "powers that be" have been told endless numbers of times that we don't want regions, we just want to keep our own country.

Twat of the Week: Tony Blair

What a difference a day makes. The Fat Turd was just in front of the pack yesterday when I last checked but Traitor Blair has just edged ahead to take the title.

John Prescott 24%5
Tony Blair 29%6
Alistair Campbell 5%1
Peter Mandelson 19%4
Francis Maude 10%2
David Cameron 14%3
21 votes total

It seems that people are a bit miffed at the fact that he is so committed to devolution for Northern Ireland but so desparately against it for England. Maybe someone will get the opportunity to ask him about it one day although I doubt he'd answer with anything other than the vacant over-shoulder stare that greets any other question he doesn't want to answer.

Well, it gives me great please to once again declare Tony Blair this week's Twat of the Week.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

April Showers

Woke up to a dusting of snow yesterday and we had a couple of good snow storms today. The snow and ground were both too wet to stick but strange weather for April. I blame global warming.

Saturday, April 08, 2006

Health Budget cuts to prop up other authorities

In the same day that it is announced that Welsh women will be able to travel over the border to the Royal Shrewsbury Hospital to receive Herceptin, it emerges that Telford's PCT will have to cut back its budget to help prop up other authorities in the West Midlands. This is before Telford joins the West Midlands City Region, what will it be like when Telford's health service is run from Birmingham? Talking about rubbing salt into the wound.

Health bosses to to tighten budget

By Health Correspondent Dave Morris
Health bosses in Telford & Wrekin have been warned to tighten their belts after being ordered to shave millions of pounds from this year's budget.

Key initiatives such as improving sexual health services and plans for cutting obesity levels are having to be put on hold for 12 months.

The borough's Primary Care Trust (PCT) which employs about 500 people, is holding vacancies open for as long as possible and reducing its contingency cash reserve in a bid to save money.

There will be no staff training unless necessary to meet mandatory requirements.

Last month it was revealed that the PCT would have to contribute £2.6 million towards establishing a new national payment system for hospital services.


But on top of this the trust, which has just finished the past financial year in balance, must also contribute £5.3 million to the cost of setting up a regional NHS "bank" that will help balance the books of other health organisations across the West Midlands.

Despite the savings already identified, it still faces a £2,5 million gap.

A progress report will be presented to the trust board next Tuesday.

Simon Conolly, PCT chief executive, said today: "We are having to look at things such aa deferring service developments, holding vacancies open and making economies in prescribing.

"It is real belt tightening for the year ahead but we are required to release this money.

"We are trying to minimise the impact on patients.

He said existing services provided by the trust would not be cut.

Chairwoman Sue Davis said that "in theory" the money should be paid back to the PCT next year.

Kick in the teeth for Shropshire women

Cancer drug for women over border sparks fury

Breast cancer patients from Wales will jet the drug Herceptin free of charge at the Royal Shrewsbury Hospital while Shropshire women are still expected to pay £47,000 for private treatment.

It is believed the women would be cared or by the same teams that would treat Shropshire patients if health chiefs agreed to fund the drug.

The move, revealed today, has angered North Shropshire MP Owen Paterson who has been campaigning for free treatment for cancer patients in his constituency.

He is demanding an explanation from Health Secretary Patricia Hewitt and claimed Shropshire patients fighting to get Herceptin on the NHS had been dealt another "kick in the teeth".

It is believed that up to fbur women from Mid Wales will be treated at their "local" Royal Shrewsbury Hospital.

The drug is fully funded in Wales for early stage cancer, but the Shropshire County Primary Care Trust has said it will not fund it for early stage cancer until it is fully licensed, a move expected by he summer.

This could lead to about 40 patients from Shropshire, including Telford & Wrekin, being eligible for Herceptin on the NHS at a cost of more than £1.2 million.

Julie Grant, Shropshire Bounty PCT chief executive, said today "Everyone is finding the situation difficult. The sooner we get national clarity the better."

Suzanne Digwood, of Loughton, near Bridgnorth, who has been campaigning to get Herceptin on the NHS, said the drug was being handed out in the style of a postcode lottery.

"It's unethical and not right," she said.

Twat of the Week voting

This weeks candidates for Twat of the Week are:

John "Fat Turd" Prescott (reasons)
Traitor Blair (reasons)
Alistair Campbell (reasons)
Peter Mandelson (reasons)
Francis Maude - for lauding New Labour & claiming they have "taken class out of politics"
David Cameron - for talking to Tony Blair about party political funding. Presumably he needs a few tips...on how to screw the rest of us. What goes on in the minds of these supposed Conservatives?

Twat of the Week
John Prescott
Tony Blair
Alistair Campbell
Peter Mandelson
Francis Maude
David Cameron
Free polls from

Friday, April 07, 2006

BBC rewriting history

The Americans are famous for rewriting history so that Americans are involved in ever major event since the dawn of time but now it seems the BBC are getting in on the act.

The BBC has country profiles on their website for every country and territory in the world. The country profiles give a brief history of the country or territory, often with a timeline. Now, bearing in mind that until the Act of Union 1707, the United Kingdom (aka "Britain") didn't exist, you would be perhaps a little surprised to see the BBC explaining that Anguilla became a British colony in 1650 rather than an English colony.

You might start to wonder if someone was having a bad day when you read that Bermuda became a British colony in the late 17th century (1600's). You might even be inclined to give them the benefit of the doubt when they claim that in 1672 the British Virgin Islands were annexed to Britain, 35 years before "Britain" even existed.

However, when you read the rest of the country profiles for the British Territories and find that every single one of them was supposedly captured, annexed or ceded to Britain before "Britain" existed you really have to winder what agenda the BBC is following.

The Cayman Islands were apparently ceded to Britain in 1670. Britain supposedly captured Gibraltar in 1704 and in 1690 a British colony was established on the Falkland Islands. In 1632 Montserrat became a British colony and the Turks and Caicos Islands were ceded to Britain in 1670 along with the Cayman Islands and Jamaica.

I wonder how many students have used the BBC website to research this kind of stuff only to be fed what can only be described as deliberately misleading information?

Investigating Crime is a ridiculous waste of time

Alistair Campbell, former Labour propoganda merchant and currently ... what does he actually do for a living nowadays? Whatever, he's decided that the police investigation of Traitor Blair for selling peerages in exchange for loans is a ridiculous waste of time.

Absolutely agree. The very idea that the leader of this country should be investigated by the police for potentially breaking multiple laws is preposterous. I mean, how's the country supposed to function effectively if politicians are expected to follow the letter of the law and be criticised when they don't?

NI will get devolved government back

The i's have been dotted and the t's crossed in a deal between Traitor Blair and Bertie Ahern to restore devolved government to Northern Ireland.

The NI Assembly will be recalled on May 15th when members will be given 6 weeks to form an executive. If they fail to do so they will be given another 12 weeks after the summer recess to get their act together. If they still can't sort themselves out by November 24th their expenses and salaries (which they still get despite not having a job to do) will be stopped and the UK government will press ahead with "partnership arrangements" (power-sharing) regardless.

I'm really pleased for our North West British neighbours. They are getting back something which the English are actively denied - equal access to democracy and a say in what happens in their own country. Labour should be ashamed at this blatant racial discrimination and undemocratic behaviour.

Twat of the Week Nominations

Talk about super organised, I've remembered Twat of the Week before Sunday evening!

Same as usual please, any nominations in the comments or contact me.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Fake Sheik

Mahzer Mahmood, the News of the World undercover reporter who tried to entrap George Galloway, has a court injunction preventing the publishing of his picture in the UK. The injunction covers press, TV and even public networks including the internet.

Interestingly, if I link to the picture on a server outside of the EU like so ...

... I'm not actually breaking the injunction because the picture is published elsewhere.

Guido has been threatened with court action for showing pictures of Mahmood on his blog. The blog is located on an American server, the owners of which have sent a rather amusing letter to Mahmood's lawyers telling them to bog off.

Letter: Shropshire Star

Our taxes should be spent on England

The Shropshire Star is now running almost daily stories highlighting the plight of those unfortunate English women who are denied Herceptin.

There are stories of fundraising events and kind donations but the actual cause and solution for the Herceptin problem never seems to get a mention.

Herceptin is available even for the early stages of breast cancer in Scotland and Wales, but not in England. The reason (jiven by the National Institute of Clinical Excellence (NICE) and Primary Care Trusts (PCTs) for denying this drug is that it is too expensive.

So why can Scottish and Welsh women get Herceptin? Scotland and Wales are funded from the UK Treasury using the Barnett Formula which provides for an annual subsidy from English taxes to make up the difference between the amount of tax they pay and the amount they spend.

England will never be able to afford the same level of service as Scotland and Wales while Scottish and Welsh MPs are controlling the English health service.

An English parliament spending English taxes on English people is what these women need, not sympathy.

Ask your MP what they are going to do to stop the British government discriminating against you.

Stuart Parr

Bird Flu in Fife confirmed as H5N1 strain

The swan found in North Britain with bird flu has been confirmed as having the H5N1 strain which is dangerous to humans.

The authorities have swung into action with the usual "we're working our way up to doing something some time soon when the kettle's boiled" attitude and the North British First Minister has pledged to bravely continue his jolly in the states.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Ignorant Jock pokes his nose in again

The Ignorant Jock and Traitor Blair have but on a "show of unity" according to the BBC.

They are referring to the joint launch of Labour's English local election campaign yesterday in which the two loved each other up and told everyone how great things were under New Labour and how council tax bills (which have risen over 80% in England and 40% in North Britain) are so much lower than they were.

One question - why is Gordon Brown, the Chancellor of the Exchequer and MP for Kirkaldy and Cowdenbeath in North Britain, having anything at all to do with the English local elections? His constituency is in North Britain, not England and he should keep his snivelling nose out of our business. I suppose the only up-side of his interference is that it'll make more English people wonder why the Ignorant Jock is campaigning south of the border and there's a good chance he'll be about as much use as he was in his neighbouring constituency where his campaigning on behalf of the incumbent Labour candidate helped her lose a huge majority and means that his home is now in a constituency out of Labour control.

Cameron calls UKIP closet racists

David Cameron, the man who is most likely to be the next elected Prime Minister, has bizzarely described UKIP as a party of loonies, fruitcakes and closet racists.

Even more bizzarely, the founder of UKIP agreed with him and said that since he left the party they were obsessed with immigration and had shifted from the centre to far right politics.

Loonies and fruitcakes I can't really pick fault with as they are a bit of a strange bunch but closet racists? Perhaps Mr Cameron has forgotten that the Tories fought the last election with a manifesto centred around tighter immigration and asylum laws?

Bird Flu confirmed in UK


The UK's first case of Bird Flu has been confirmed in North Britain.

Vets have confirmed that a dead swan in Fife had the H5 avian flu virus and "in accordance with a recent EU decision the Scottish Executive is putting in place a protection zone of a minimum of three kilometres radius and a surveilance zone of 10 kilometres".

Not wishing to detract from the obvious seriousness of this story but why are the EU always behind these sorts of decisions and why are the government using kilometres instead of miles more and more often nowadays? The main example that springs to mind is the law that prevents people from spoiling the view protesting outside parliament which sets a 1km exclusion zone around parliament.

Anyway, back to the story. Only this morning I saw on the news that farmers were renewing their demand that the UK government immunise poultry and birds to try and prevent an outbreak. The powers that be have been harping on about us being an island and less at risk of getting bird flu here somehow missing one of the key distinguishing features of birds - they can fly.

So, bugger all has been done apart from receiving instructions from the EU on what to do and grinning at the cameras whilst reassuring us that it's never going to happen. Now we have a confirmed case of bird flu in the UK and the North British First Minister isn't even planning to cut short his holiday Tartan Week engagement in the USA.

Sweaty Baboon

Who'd have thought that the Sweaty Baboon googlebomb would have attracted so much attention?

I kicked it off a couple of months ago and it shot to the #1 spot remarkably quickly. I checked today to make sure it was still in the top spot (which it was) and then thought "I wonder what these other matches are". I was amazed to find page upon page of links to web pages talking about the Sweaty Baboon googlebomb!

Makes me feel all warm and fluffy inside.

Progressive Rock/Metal

A friend of mine is a drummer. Not just a drummer in fact but one of the most talented musicians around. And I'm not just saying that because he's a friend.

Anyway, he's been writing with an excellent guitarist and they've got an album in the offing. There are some demo tracks here.

I did ask what the first track was about as it sounds like a xylophone and got something about it being a good sound effect in return. The other three demos sound really good. It's prog rock/metal and has a bit of a Dream Theater sound about it. Reminds me of the Metropolis Part 1 album.

Anyway, pop along, have a listen and maybe send them some constructive comments.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Twat of the Week: Jack Straw

Pretty close voting this week, probably due to an abundance of twattish behaviour last week. However, the Demon Headmaster managed to pull clear in the end to be crowned this weeks Twat of the Week.

Lord Falconer 25%3
Jack Straw 42%5
John Prescott 0%0
Tery Leahy 17%2
David Cameron 17%2
12 votes total

Jack Straw, it gives me great pleasure to declare you this weeks Twat of the Week. May it be the first of many.

Secret Police

SOCA came into being yesterday, dubbed as the UK's own FBI. A more accurate simile would be Secret Police or Stazi.

The officers employed by SOCA have the same powers as police officers, immigration officers and customs officers. This means they have the power of arrest, the power to decide who can and cannot come out of the country, and the power to enter premises and sieze goods without a warrant. They also have the power to demand "intelligence" from banks, companies, etc. without a warrant.

They claim to be independent of the British government but their "strategic priorities" are set by the Home Secretary and the Chair, Director General and Non-Executive Directors of SOCA are also appointed by the Home Secretary. Their budget, allocated to them by the British government, is £457m for 2006/7. Very independent.

So they have all this power, they don't need warrants so don't have to justify themselves to a court and are immune from the Freedom of Information Act.

Monday, April 03, 2006

Twat of the Week voting

Ok, a bit of a rush job because my super organisation skills are ... non-existent actually. That and I have a really bad thingy ... tip of my tongue ... memory, that's it!

Twat of the Week
Lord Falconer
Jack Straw
John Prescott
Terry Leahy
David Cameron
Free polls from

I'll post the results as soon as there are enough votes to make it worthwhile so clicky clicky.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

More Illegal Protests

Some (mainly) muslim protesters were outside Parliament today reading out the names of Iraqis killed in the war.

Why weren't they arrested like the woman reading the names of our own dead soldiers?

Maybe they all changed their surnames to Blair beforehand - that seems to be the best way of getting away with breaking the law.

Mail on Sunday tackles Tesco

The Mail on Sunday have tackled Tesco over their decision to brand English food as British, albeit in a rather half-hearted manner.

It seems Tesco have been telling porkies though. In their statement to the MoS, they say that only a small number of lines were ever marked as English when the pre-prepared response they have sent out to god knows how many people says that English produce was labelled as such until research a few years ago showed the British flag was more recognisable.

I've sent an email to the MoS and the Daily Mail to point out that Tesco are misleading them. Don't expect it'll get printed though as their letter censor doesn't seem to like me.

It appears that the Mail on Sunday has been misled by Tesco.

In the article on Tesco labelling English food as British and Scottish, Welsh and Northern Irish food as being from those respective nations, Tesco is quoted as saying that only a few lines ever carried the English flag.

When I asked Tesco why they labelled English food as British they told me that English food used to be labelled as such until a few years ago when their research showed that the Union Flag was more recognisable. When I suggested that their research was out of date they became quite hostile.

Tesco claim that England is too big and diverse to market as a single region by placing the English flag on English products. This doesn't seem to apply during the world cup or six nations when they are quite happy to sell England shirts and memorabilia across the country.

It seems that Tesco are quite happy to put English pounds into their tills but not quite so happy to acknowledge the existence of the country that provdes well over three quarters of its profit in the UK.

Twat of the Week nominations

Yes, I know it should be difficult to forget something that happens every week but I've managed to forget Twat of the Week again.

Ok, quick as you can, nominations please. Same as usual, post in the comments or contact me.

First nomination courtesy of Alfie (thanks for the reminder) is David Cameron. Mine is the Sweaty Baboon for still pressing ahead with police mergers (10 forces for 50m English people and 8 for 5m Scots?), still pressing ahead with compulsary ID Cards and for being a generally lying scumbag.

Buying English Stuff

Just a reminder that St George's Day is coming up in 21 days. If your flag is looking a bit tatty or you simply haven't got one then pop over to En-ger-land and get your order in before it's too late. I gather that demand has been high this year so don't leave it until the last minute.

In fact, while you're emptying your PayPal account, why not get this T-Shirt as well? It's $16.99 which is about £9.50.

The message on the shirt reads:

Sponsoring Scotland since 1707

Disclaimer: No liability will be accepted for lost teeth and/or limbs if you wear this shirt in Scotland.

55% pensions tax won't affect Blair

As I thought, the new 55% tax on pensions contributions exceeding the persons annual income won't affect Traitor Blair's £96k per year pension. Neither, of course, will the public sector pension "reforms" that the equally treacherous Ignorant Jock is orchestrating.

Perpetual Energy Developed

A sure-fire way of creating Perpetual Motion has been devised involving only a packet of butter and a household cat. Check out Karl's Asylum for details.

Saturday, April 01, 2006

English are cleverer than the Socts and Irish

Mail on Sunday

The English are cleverer than the Socts and Irish but not as clever as the Dutch or Germans. Bugger.

55% pension tax

New rules brought in by the Ignorant Jock take effect today which will tax some pensions at 55%.

Pension contributions up to a certain amount will be tax free but those exceeding the threshold will be taxed at 55%. I don't expect this will affect ministerial pensions though.

Racist Crime up 12%

According to the Home Office's British Crime Survey which monitors crime in England and Wales, racist crime is up 12%. The report doesn't appear to specify what percentage of the racist crime is commited by minorities against white people or other minority groups.

The report also says that a black person is 6 times more likely to be stopped and searched and an asian 2 times more likely. The report also doesn't appear to give any figures on what percentage of crimes are committed by black and asian people in relation to the size of their population in England and Wales.

If black people commit 6 times more crimes than white people then this statistic is obviously not a problem but there seems to be this obsession with finding racism everywhere even if it doesn't exist and particularly in the police force where black and asian officers are fast tracked at the expense of their white colleagues despite the police apparently being institutionally racist.

More Summary Justice - Lord Falconer

Lord Falconer of Neptune Uranus, unelected Labour stooge and anglophone, has decided that we are going to have a criminal justice system that will "make more use of summary justice".

The courts will no longer deal with speeding fines and other minor motoring offences and TV licence evasion. These will be dealth with by a new "bulk processing centre". The offenses will only go to court if they are contested.

Lord Falconer has resisted attempts by Sir Ian Blair, the corrupt chief of the Metropolitan Police, to give powers to selected police officers to allow them to give out driving bans and ASBO's without ging to court. He also resisted the Sweaty Baboon's preferred method of justice which is, naturally, the Napoleonic system of "justice" where a defendant is interrogated and has to prove their innocence.

This new style of justice contravenes Habeas Corpus and the Bill of Rights, both of which still have legal force in England and as constitutional laws have primacy over newer laws such as the one that will be required to butcher our legal system per Lord Falconer's recommendations.

I'm trying to find a polite way of telling Lord Falconer to poke his fat unelected nose out of our business but I can't think of one. Any suggestions?

Minority Rule in Swansea

Swansea City Council has gone the way of England and is now under minority rule.

The council had been under the control of a coalition which formed a majority but two members have resigned after criticising secrecy leaving a minority cabinet in charge of the council.

Nice to see some of our West British neighbours experiencing life under minority rule as the English have done since the last election when the Conservatives took over 60,000 votes more than Labour but less seats as a result of rigged constituencies.

Another abuse of the Terrorism Act

Four men arrested under the Terrorism Act outside a hospital in Stafford have been released without charge as they have no links to Terrorism or any other crime.

The day after the men were arrested it was reported on the news that the Police had said they had been arrested under the Terrorism Act despite there being no evidence that they had any involvement in terrorism.

This latest abuse of the Terrorism Act joins the arrest of Walter Wolfgang for saying "nonsense" when Jack Straw was talking at the Labour Party conference, the stop & search of every attendee at the Labour Party conference and the arrest of a woman in North Britain for walking down a tow path, all of which were carried out under the Terrorism Act despite blatantly having nothing to do with terrorism.

Free Eye Tests for all ...

... Scots.

Eye tests in Scotland are free of charge as from today, yet another perk that is denied to English people but paid for from English taxes.