Oi Darling, you’re barred!

! This post hasn't been updated in over a year. A lot can change in a year including my opinion and the amount of naughty words I use. There's a good chance that there's something in what's written below that someone will find objectionable. That's fine, if I tried to please everybody all of the time then I'd be a Lib Dem (remember them?) and I'm certainly not one of those. The point is, I'm not the kind of person to try and alter history in case I said something in the past that someone can use against me in the future but just remember that the person I was then isn't the person I am now nor the person I'll be in a year's time.

Alistair Darling, King of the Caterpillars, gave his first budget the other day. I really didn’t have the energy to give it the fisking it deserved but needless to say it was shit. More taxes and £14bn of extra government borrowing over the next two years to pay for whatever crap it is he intends to overspend on.

It’s quite clear, even to someone without a degree in macroeconomics, that the country is insolvent. No Mandate Brown was about as prudent as Heather Mills with our money during his ten year reign of terror at the Treasury creating tax and spend policy after tax and spend policy, borrowing more and more money to pay for it and moving his own borrowing targets around when it was evident he was going to miss them.

One policy that has really got peoples’ attention is the huge hike in tax on booze which the pub industry has said is the final nail in the coffin of the traditional pub. Christ knows how many pubs are going out of business on a weekly basis – it’s a lot and it’s only going to get worse. The simple fact is, it’s already cheaper to drink at home than it is to go to the pub. With the latest tax increase, it’s just going to be too expensive and casual drinkers are going to plump for a 5 litre bottle of Lambrusco or a 6 pack of Stella at home rather than pay pub prices.

We all know booze is almost a national hobby in England so it’s unsurprising that an internet campaign has kicked off to get Alistair Darling barred from every pub in the UK inspired by a pub in Scotland that has actually already barred him because of his budget. It’s taking off pretty quickly – there’s a Facebook group, some posters and talk of at least one industry publication considering supporting it nationwide.

I have this image in my head of posters of Al Murray pointing his finger with the words “Oi Darling, you’re barred!” in pubs up and down the country. What better way to show the contempt that Depression Darling deserves? Pub landlords are only the tip of the iceberg – the disastrous mismanagement of the economy by successive Scottish chancellors has brought the country to the brink of depression with absolutely nothing left in the bank with which to weather the storm. In short, we’re screwed.

See Also:

Devil’s Kitchen, Man in a Shed, Reactionary Snob, Mr Eugenides, Fora, MacNumpty, Toque

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7 comments

  1. axel (1214 comments) says:

    No, the place that barred him is an absolute hole. One of many scottish boozers that have been effectively killed by the smoking ban. The jakeys that drink there are the dregs of a society that let them get like that, evolve or die or in most of their cases, wash or die.

    The place is an absolute shit hole!

    However, that still does not stop Alistar boy, being a cock!

  2. KeithS (80 comments) says:

    “It’s quite clear, even to someone without a degree in macroeconomics, that the country is insolvent.”

    I’ll say. Want to see how insolvent?
    https://www.cia.gov/library/publications/the-world-factbook/rankorder/2187rank.html
    Time we stopped pretending that we’re one of the leading economies of the world, and cut our suit according to our cloth methinks.

  3. Scaffold (146 comments) says:

    It is grim reality: non-manufacturing nations can not expect to have proftable economy.

  4. axel (1214 comments) says:

    What about the City?

    They seem to make enough, out of effectively nothing!

  5. Scaffold (146 comments) says:

    As we all can see, they are NOT making enough! Without manufactured goods export, the economy is effectively dead.

  6. Curly (1 comments) says:

    I note that Cameron drinks in all the right pubs these days!

  7. Jim (4 comments) says:

    Why just Alistair Darling? If every pub barring Darling had posters barring local Labour politucians as well it would certainly put the pressure on Darling from them as they get criticised locally for supporting this.

    Believe me. There’s one thing that will make politicians put pressure on their bosses. It’s local criticism of themselves and the threat of losing their seats.

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