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Archive for the 'Sport' Category

29 Jan

Anyone but Murray

Andy “Anyone but England” Murray is looking worryingly close to winning his first ever grand slam in Australia.
If he wins, life will be unbearable for those of us who can’t stand the tantrum-throwing, anti-English, second rate Scottish tennis player.

The BBC will devote its entire schedule to the life and times of Andy Murray, the Sun [...]

03 Jul

Come on Andy …

… Roddick.
 
Can you imagine how unbearable it would be if Miserable Murray won Wimbledon?  The 2 hour documentaries and clip shows the BBC will be showing for months afterwards, the knighthood for services to Scottish British tennis, El Gordo gurning his congratulations in Parliament.
God, it doesn’t bear thinking about.  Best get those voodoo dolls ready.
[...]

23 Jun

Setanta goes bust, Liverpool to follow?

Setanta went into administration today owing £3m to the Scottish Premier League and £30m to the English Premier League.
The Scottish Premier League is looking for a new buyer for £125m of broadcasting rights for the next 4 years and the English Premier League is looking to offload the rest of the matches Setanta had already [...]

23 Jun

Anyone but Murray

Wimbledon has started and the BBC are excited about the prospects of British Scottish British Scottish British Scottish Sour Faced Tosser, Andy Murray.
Personally, I couldn’t give a flying fuck which round he crashes out in as long as he cries like a baby.

Amusingly, the above image is the first match in a Google image search [...]

02 May

Shrewsbury make the play-offs

The mighty Shrews have beaten Dagenham & Redbridge to enter the League 2 play-offs.
All that stands between Shrewsbury Town and a return to League 2 is a couple of games.

At the start of the season it looked like they had promotion in the bag, then it all went a bit iffy before finally scraping back [...]

06 Apr

Andy Murray wins something

Andy “Anyone but England” Murray has won something.
It’s only the Miami Open but the BBC are beside themselves that the miserable jock has won something.  Imagine how unbearable they’d be if he won a grand slam?  Time to stock up on Andy Murray voodoo dolls.

Technorati Tags: Andy Murray, Miami Open

23 Mar

Anyone but Murray

Andy “Anyone but England” Murray lost again last night against Nadal.  Shame.

Technorati Tags: Anyone but Murray

21 Mar

England 26 – 12 Scotland

The cheese eating surrender monkeys last week and the sweaty socks this week.  We might not have won the Six Nations but we battered both the auld enemies and that’s good enough for me.

Technorati Tags: England, Scotland, France, Rugby, Six Nations

28 Feb

England -v- Ireland

I will be Tweeting the the England -v- Ireland Six Nations game.
Follow the commentary on Twitter or Facebook.
Edit:
If anyone is interested, here’s the commentary from Twitter …

England get the British national anthem again. When will we get Jerusalem instead?
National anthem scores: England 0 – 2 Ireland
All 3 BBC commentators – English, Irish and Welsh – [...]

24 Jan

Anyone but Murray

Andy “Anyone but England” Murray has progressed to the fourth round of the Australian Open and looks dangerously close to winning his first ever grand slam.
Don’t worry though, there’s still time to make your very own Andy “Anyone but England” Murray voodoo doll by following these simple instructions.

Technorati Tags: Andy Murray

20 Dec

Team GB again

FIFA have agreed to a British football team for the 2012 Olympics and No Mandate Brown has got assurances from Sepp Blatter that the independence of the Scottish, Welsh and Northern Irish teams will be maintained.
The English, Scottish, Welsh and Northern Irish fan associations are all opposed to a British football team and the Scottish, [...]

30 Nov

Histon? Who are they?

I can honestly say, I’ve never been excited about a football match that didn’t involve a team I support but I’ve just been on the edge of my seat watching Histon play Leeds.
Watching a team I remember being one of the best in England go down 1-0 to a non-league team is great but wathing [...]

11 Oct

? What a difference a Dave Makes ?

The second half of tonight’s game against Kazakhstan couldn’t have been more different from the first.
It took 7 minutes of the second half to score the first goal and they came thick and apart from a lucky goal by Kazakhstan, England dominated the second half.
But England still looked like they were going through the motions [...]

11 Oct

Half Time: England 0-0 Kazakhstan

Kazakhstan?  Kazakhfuckingstan?
What a bloody shambles.  We should be 5-0 up by now at least but no – half way through the game and it’s still 0-0.  Not only that but Kazakhstan look like they have about 30 men on the pitch.
There have been moments when England looked like a World Cup winning team but they’ve [...]

13 Sep

In your face Gillingham

I thought Mrs Sane was taking the piss when she said that Shrewsbury were winning 6-0, imagine my surprise when I saw that by the time the final whistle was blown, they had actually won 7-0!

Technorati Tags: Shrewsbury Town, Gillingham

10 Sep

England -v- Croatia

Currently watching England -v- Croatia via Sopcast from somewhere out in the far east – China or somewhere like that by the looks of the presenters.
Few too many adverts but it’s free.
Update:
England won 4-1, well played. Technorati Tags: England, Croatia, Football

09 Sep

Diddums

Andy “Anyone but England” Murray lost his first ever grand slam final to some dirty diego by the name of Federa.  Shame.
 
When the BBC wet themselves with excitement over him getting to the finals he was the Scotsman, Andy Murray.  When he lost he was the British hopeful, Andy Murray. 
Technorati Tags: Andy Murray

06 Sep

Word Cup Qualifiers

England plays Andorra tonight in the World Cup qualifiers.  Will I be watching?  Will I buggery – it’s only on Setanta and there is no way I’m subscribing to a bloody sports channel just to watch one football match and I’ll tell you why …
Firstly, I don’t have that much interest in sport.  I like [...]

24 Aug

Sorry, who gave football to the world?

No Mandate Brown has told Sky News that he hopes there will be a Team UK for the 2012 Olympics.  Not Team GB you’ll note, but Team UK.  Great Britain doesn’t include Northern Ireland – something that doesn’t seem to bother Lieutenant Governor Brown in Beijing – but the Northern Ireland FA is the only [...]

18 Aug

Why “Team GB”?

I have no interest in the Olympics – we don’t have an English team and there are many, many more things that those billions could be spent on, like cancer treatments and housing homeless people.
I do have to wonder, though, why the UK’s Olympic body insists on calling its team “Great Britain”.
Great Britain is a [...]

14 Aug

Shropshire Star: Why can’t we all just be Brits?

This letter was in the Shropshire Star last night.  The title wasn’t my idea …

Why can’t we all just be Brits
Great Britain won its first gold medal of the Olympics on Sunday.  The BBC were beside themselves and delighted in telling the world that the medal winner was Welsh and it was the first Welsh [...]

09 Aug

Olympics: yawn

Am I the only one that has absolutely zero interest in the Olympics?
The BBC have devoted BBC1 to covering the games, even the Breakfast programme has been relegated to the News 24 channel.
I might be more interested if there was an English team but I just can’t get excited about Team GB, even when I [...]

02 Jul

Exit court left

Me again. Wonko will get back from his well-earned break and wonder what he’s done giving me access to this… Still, I’m here with some good news this time: English-hating tennis hack Andy Murray has been knocked out of wimbledon.
Good riddance you lanky streak of Scottish piss. One can only hope he will never darken [...]

24 Jun

Wimbledon

Wimbledon is upon us again – another few weeks of boredom and seemingly endless coverage of some people hitting a ball at each other at 3,000mph.
Andy Murray was in the papers at the weekend telling us how terribly upset he is that people think he’s anti-English because his gran lives in Newcastle and it was [...]

21 Jun

Damn Ruskies

The Netherlands’ performance in the first three games of Euro 2008 was a small consolation for England getting knocked out in the qualifying stages and now those damn Ruskies have spoilt it!
Russia, unbelievably, beat the Netherlands 3-1.
Ah well, no more football for me.  The Dutch are the only team in the competition I could bring [...]

09 Jun

Netherlands 3 – 0 Italy

The Netherlands, my adopted team for Euro 2008, have dealt Italy their biggest ever defeat in international football, beating them by 3 goals to nowt.
Even when they were 3 goals up, the Netherlands were still attacking and came close to scoring a fourth.
It’s a good start for the Dutch – they needed it too, the [...]

07 Jun

Euro 2008

I’m not a big football fan, as evidenced by supporting Shrewsbury Town, but I do quite like international football.
England, of course, didn’t qualify for Euro 2008 giving us an insight into what it must be like for Scottish and Welsh people during every international football tournament.
I wouldn’t normally bother supporting a foreign team but this [...]

31 May

Football quota’s – good or bad thing?

I’m undecided on Sepp Blatter’s plans to impose quotas on foreign players in football teams.

On the plus side, it’s pissed off Federal Europe who have declared it illegal.
On the negative side, anything involving Sepp Blatter must be a bad thing.
On the plus side, it means English clubs will have to invest in English talent instead [...]

20 May

Anthem4England: What’s good enough for Wales is good enough for England!

WHAT’S GOOD ENOUGH FOR WALES IS GOOD ENOUGH FOR ENGLAND! – MULHOLLAND
Embargo: Immediate, Tuesday 20th May 2008
Greg Mulholland, MP for Leeds North West, has said that, after the Welsh National Anthem was played alongside God Save the Queen at Wembley at the weekend to mark the fact that Cardiff City made the final, it is [...]

30 Mar

Rooney criticised for not singing British anthem

Bob Peedle, Chairman of the Royal Society of St George, has criticised Wayne Rooney for not singing the British national anthem before England games.
Apparently, Rooney doesn’t know the words which Peedle thinks is disgraceful and has offered to teach them to him.
The Royal Society of St George is there to promote England and the Commonwealth, singing [...]

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