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Archive for the 'Scotland' Category

29 Mar

Wendy Alexander: lying hypocrite

Wendy Alexander has addressed the Scottish Liebour spring gathering and told them that she will lead them to victory in the Scottish Parliament. Yeah, right.
In a characteristic display of utter hypocrisy, she said that she “will lead by exposing the dishonesty of the SNP”. Dishonesty of the SNP? Sorry Wendy Love, […]

27 Mar

SNP calls for independence referendum

Alex the Salmon, First Minister of Scotland, has proposed a referendum on the future of governance of Scotland with two questions - enhanced devolution or independence.
The Conswervative and Unionist Party, Liebour and the Illiberal Dumbocrats have all shrieked hysterically that it’s “the wild words of a panicking man” and an “attempt to drag an unwilling […]

08 Mar

Nooooooooooooooooooooooo

England have lost to Scotland in the Six Nations.
I don’t mind England losing (I’d rather we didn’t of course) just as long as it’s not to Scotland!
Technorati Tags: England, Scotland, Rugby

07 Mar

Can’t save lives, the Scots won’t like it

Tom Yeo, the Conswervative MP for Suffolk South, introduced a private members bill to get the clocks put forward one hour to save lives and energy and increase leisure and social time.
As with previous attempts by various MPs the bill failed with the usual arguments being put forward - the farmers won’t like it and […]

06 Mar

Murray loses again

Andy “Anyone But England” Murray has been beaten again and almost got censured for swearing.

Technorati Tags: Andy Murray

04 Feb

Six Nations: Scotland -v- France

Saturday’s defeat at the hands of the mutton munchers was made slightly more palatable by yesterday’s demolition of the sweaty socks by the cheese eating surrender monkey’s.
Our friends north of the border lost by 21 points putting them firmly at the bottom of the table on points difference after the opening fixtures.  Hopefully they’ll stay there […]

28 Jan

CEP: England victimised yet again by United Kingdom government

CEP: England victimised yet again by United Kingdom government
The Council tax in England will be going up in April by just under 5%, more than twice the limit on pay increases being imposed by the Union Government. The average Council Tax bill in England will go up by £115 per month. Meanwhile in Scotland the […]

09 Jan

Government to ban prison officers from striking …

… but only in England and Wales.
The Scottish Executive have ruled out a ban on Scottish prison officers going on strike saying that they have an agreement for binding arbitration in the event of a dispute with prison officers.
Jack Straw intends to ban prison officers in England and Wales from striking if a voluntary arbitration […]

23 Dec

Two countries to have EU Constitution referendum

The Republic of Ireland will hold a referendum on the EU not-a-constitution thanks to the provisions of their constitution.
Denmark was expected to hold a referendum when it was reported that a majority of Danish MPs wanted one but this appears to have fallen by the wayside.
Enter Alex Salmond:
When the constitutional treaty was alive, the Labour […]

10 Dec

Could England’s future be in the hands of Kosovo?

Kosovo has suffered terribly at the hands of the Serbs ever since Yugoslavia broke up.
For a while now, Federal Europe has provided mediators to try and come up with a solution that would allow Kosovo to remain part of Serbia which would be acceptable to both the Serbs who don’t want to lose Kosovo and to […]

07 Dec

Now the Police are missing out

English police are on the receiving end of the same racist treatment as English nurses when it comes to pay increases.
Earlier this year, our nurses were told that they would be getting the same percentage pay rise as Scottish nurses but rather than a single pay increase like in Scotland, their pay increase was to […]

30 Nov

Happy St Andrews Day

I’d like to wish a Happy St Andrews Day to all my Scottish readers, friends and enemies.
To mark our neighbour’s special day, I will refrain from taking the piss out of Scotland or Scottish people for the duration.
Technorati Tags: Scotland, St Andrews Day

28 Nov

Vibrant?

From the BBC … 
Ministers have come up with a “vibrant” new message to greet tourists arriving at Scotland’s airports. 
The new message is … “Welcome to Scotland”.
Gosh.
Technorati Tags: Scotland, WTF

18 Nov

Scottish woman travels to Malta for hip replacement

A Scottish woman who doctors said was 30lbs overweight has travelled to Malta for two hip replacements at a cost of £7,000 each because the Scottish NHS refused to even put her on the waiting list.
I guess I must be lucky (if you look at it that way) in that I’ve never been turned down for […]

17 Nov

Scotland - Italy

I only wish the match wasn’t on Sky Sports so I could cheer Italy on.
Italy are leading Scotland 1-0 in the second half.
Update:
18:24 - Noooooooooooooo, Scotland have equalised.
Update:
Scotland lost 2-1 to Italy and are out of the Euro 2008 competition.

Technorati Tags: Football, Italy, Scotland

29 Oct

Bit more salt in the wound, sir?

The Crossrail project - a huge train network in the south east of England, centred on London - is estimated to cost the taxpayer £16,500,000,000.
The breakdown is as follows:

Building Crossrail - £16,000,000,000
Buying Scottish votes - £500,000,000

Under the Barnett Formula, Scotland is entitled to £500m purely because £16bn is being spent in England.  It doesn’t matter that […]

23 Oct

Free Prescriptions for all …

… Scots.
The Scottish government is abolishing prescription charges in Scotland for all Scots.  At the moment, 96% of all prescriptions are dispensed free of charge.
Abolishing prescription charges north of the border is going to cost the English taxpayer another £70m.
In April this year, the Welsh government abolished all prescription charges in Wales on the same […]

22 Oct

Free school meals for primary children

Primary school children in Scotland are to get free school meals in a pilot scheme costing the English taxpayer £5m.
Parents of English children will still have to pay for their children to have school meals.
School meals in England current cost as little as 37p to produce with the British government pledging to increase this to […]

07 Oct

Scotland out of rugby world cup

Oh dear, Argentina knocked Scotland out of the rugby world cup.  Sadly, it does mean we won’t have the opportunity to dump the master race out of the competition ourselves.  Oh well …

Technorati Tags: Argentina, Scotland, rugby

24 Sep

What will Brown be doing for Scotland?

This morning I asked “What will Brown be doing to England“?  Tonight I’m asking, “What will Brown be doing to Scotland”?
What was in Britishness Brown’s speech today?
Well, he’s promised to stand up for schools* and hospitals* and British values*.  He also wants to build 10 new “eco-towns”*.
He wants to increase stop and search powers for […]

23 Sep

All Blacks demolish Scotland

The All Blacks gave Scotland a going over in the rugby today with Scotland failing to score.
Thank god we’re not going to be the only home nation to get a wooden spoon!
The most interesting thing about the whole game was the atmosphere.  Or lack of it - the crowd were virtually silent the whole way […]

06 Sep

Free university tuition in Scotland

The SNP has announced a bill to abolish the graduate endowment in Scotland making university education totally free of charge for any Scots studying in Scotland.
Under EU rules, any EU citizen studying in Scotland will automatically be entitled to the same free university education, as will the children of asylum seekers who have lived there for […]

23 Jul

Let it go!

Our celtic friends have long memories.  Half of them couldn’t tell you what caused either of the world wars or who took part in the Boer or Crimean wars but they can give you a magnificent account of the Battle of Banockburn or the Battle of Culloden.  They’ll reel off a long list of everything that the […]

14 Jun

Redistribution of wealth

I tend not to post comments on Scottish nationalist blogs because they’re generally greeted by a torrent of racist abuse or wildly inaccurate paraphrased quotes from SNP propaganda.  However, I made an exception for Richard Thomson’s blog - Scots and Independent - because he seems to be fairly well adjusted for one of our celtic neighbours.  […]

28 May

SNP pledge to abolish council tax in Scotland

The SNP have pledged to abolish the council tax in Scotland in two years.
The plan is to freeze council tax next year and replace it in 2010 with a local income tax.  The SNP is working with the Illiberal Democrats who have had local income tax as one of their policies for a long time.
According […]

17 May

SNP take power in Scotland

Alex Salmond has come to an agreement with the Greens in Scotland to become the first Scottish nationalist First Minister.
This is good news for those who would gladly see tha back of Scotland but don’t get too enthusiastic - the SNP will be forming a minority administration and any attempt to hold an independence referendum […]

01 May

Today is a special occassion

Today is the anniversary of …

The death of Hitler
The RAF bombing 2 airfields at Port Stanley in the Falklands to stop the Argies from using them
The death of Ayrton Senna
The UK’s biggest general one day strike (over a million people)
The banning of elections in Cuba
May Day riots in London in 2000

That’s from the BBC’s list […]

26 Apr

Whose oil is it anyway?

The Tartan Taxman is adhering faithfully to Labour’s new policy of reminding Scots how much they stand to lose financially if they cut the English purse strings.
He’s told the SNP that they can’t have it both ways - if they claim all the revenues from north sea oil and gas (including English oil and gas […]

22 Apr

SNP looking at a convincing victory

According to both YouGov and Populus, the SNP are looking at a comfortable victory in the Scottish Parliament elections on May 3rd.
UK Polling Report, a YouGov spin-off, says that the last time a poll showed anything other than an SNP win was November last year.
Worst case, SNP has a 4% lead over Liebour; best case, […]

29 Mar

Send a Chip

A Scottish company, sendapoo.com, has the following incitement to commit an act of racism on the front page of its website:
Not sure what to send this St. George’s Day? Why not send a poo to your favourite (or least favourite Englishman!). Send one now and select scheduled delivery for arrival on 23 April. 
Racism under English […]

18 Mar

Union is worth over £5k for each Scottish household

Traitor Blair has appealed to Scottish voters not to vote for the SNP in the May elections.
He tells the Scots that independence would cost every Scottish household over £5,000 per year because of their £11.9bn budget deficit.
Previous attempts to stop the SNP from taking control of the Scottish Parliament have centered around their dodgy maths […]

11 Mar

Another life saving drug we can’t have

The Times says that there are at least 8 other life saving drugs that are refused in England but provided on the NHS in Scotland.
This is probably part of the mysterious “union dividend” that Gordon Brown keeps talking about.  Where else in the world could 85% of the population be denied life saving cancer treatments […]

20 Jan

Scottish Accounts Commission Hypocrisy

The Scottish Accounts Commission, an agency of the Scottish Executive, has told the Shetland Islands Council that it must do more to live within its means and start spending only what money it raises.
Does this mean that every council in Scotland is going to be told to only spend what it raises?  Currently, Scotland has […]

13 Jan

The Penny’s Dropped

English wankers
If you listen very carefully you can still hear the tinkling of the dropping penny down at Downing Street.According to our leader-in-waiting, the UK is being menaced by an “opportunist group of nationalists” who are “playing fast and loose” with the union.
Apparently, “it is very important to recognise that Britishness and Britain itself is […]

07 Jan

Labour promises “best education” for Scotland

Jack McConnell, First Minister of North Britain, has promised to give Scotland the best education system in the world by 2020.
He plans to open specialist centres of excellence to push bright pupils and to make it compulsary for all 16 and 17 year olds to be in education, training or a job.
There’s no mention of […]

27 Dec

BBC Scotland: Divisions rage despite the Union

The BBC News website has an article on the union in which the writer - a political editor for BBC Scotland - questions the value of the union.
The article only appears on the Scotland pages of course, we can’t have English people seeing someone questioning the value of the union after all.
The article asks “So […]

17 Dec

Do unto others …

Alex Salmond asks if, given that the majority or MP’s with Scottish constituencies are opposed to Scotland hosting Trident, they are to have it “forced down the throats of Scotland”.
Whilst the SNP choose not to vote on matters that affect only England (for which they should be commended), the same cannot be said of their […]

12 Dec

Thieving toads

The New Labour election fund Barnett formula has been sending even more English money to our neighbours.
The Times has today published an article explaining exactly how much of our taxes goes to our thieving, subsidy junkie neighbours leaving our health service so underfunded that cancer patients are told to shut up and die because we […]

28 Nov

81% of Sun readers want independence

Yesterday’s phone-in poll amongst Sun readers resulted in 81% of people saying they wanted English independence from the rest of the UK.

26 Nov

The Union: Dead, Marw, Déide, Marbh, Neuvio, Marow

A poll in today’s Sunday Telegraph shows that a massive 68% of English people believe that England should have an English Parliament and 48% of people believe that England should declare its independence.
What is most interesting is that English support for North British independence is higher than in North Britain.
The figures are as follows:
Should Scotland become and […]

25 Nov

Bliar & Brown denounce independence

The Ignorant Jock is at the North British Labour Conference today (well he wouldn’t be at the English Labour Conference - there isn’t an English Labour Party) to tell the North British Labour Party faithful that independence would be a disaster for the nations and regions of the UK.
No doubt he’ll harp on about this […]

01 Nov

51% of Scots want independence

A poll in the Scotsman shows that 51% of North Britons want independence from the UK whilst only 39% oppose it.  Labour have also slipped 2 points below the SNP to become the number 2 party (no pun intended) in North Britain.  Strangely, the BBC fails to mention the poll but our American friends seem […]

26 Oct

You can’t have your cake and dump it

Jack McConnell, the North British First Minister, wants their nuclear waste dumped in north England rather than in North Britain where it is produced.
The British government, Scottish Parliament and Welsh Assembly are currently thrashing out a deal.
North Britain is roughly 2/3rds of the size of England but has only 5m inhabitants with England having 50m.  […]

11 Oct

Scotland -v- Ukraine

North Britain plays Ukraine tonight.  The match is live on BBC2 … come on Uuuuuuukraine.

30 Sep

Scottish Executive pledges £9m foreign aid

The North British Executive has pledged £9m in international aid to several African countries.
This is interesting for a couple of reasons, the first being that North British receives several billion pounds more than it contributes to the Treasury and therefore has no money to give to Africa and the second being that international aid is […]

19 Sep

Single Parents should be paid to stay at home

But only in North Britain of course and only as long as the English taxpayer is willing forced to pay for it.
The Childrens Commissioner for North Britain says that it will help improve parenting skills and relationships if single parents are paid to stay at home to look after their own kids.  There doesn’t seem to […]

15 Sep

Hain’s nose put out

Peter Hain, Northern Ireland and Welsh Secretary and prize bigot, has got his knickers in a twist over Tory plans to stop MP’s that don’t represent English cosntituencies from interfering in English-only legislation.
The bigot supports the Labour Stazi policy of anti-English apartheid and minority rule and sees no problem with him being able to vote […]

15 Sep

That’s right Dave, it’s all our fault

I can’t be doing with politicians that say one thing in North Britain and one thing down here.  It really, really pisses me off.  If the North Britons are going to get all upset if you don’t tell them they’re all direct decendents of Jesus, deserve the nobel peace prize for services to anglophobia and generally […]

11 Sep

Smoking age limit to change to 18

The legal age at which you can smoke in North Britain is to change to 18 in an attempt to make the country more healthy.  Smoking is already banned in all public places.
The full ban in England was diluted by an MP elected in North Britain and then voted on and passed by MP’s elected […]

10 Sep

Beware the enemy within

England is once again under the threat of terrorism from people living within our borders.  But this time it’s not one of Chairman Blair’s special muslim terrorists, it’s the master race we have to worry about.
The North British National Liberation Army (SNLA) has sent an email to the offices of the Sunday Times in Glasgow threatening […]

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